Sunday, March 31, 2013

Shower Poem

The rumours you heard are true,
I stopped my shower halfway through,
So that giant moth wouldn't drown,
For that would make me :-(

By Laura D

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Hello Kitty Tattoo Poem

Stuck on my face
Hello Kitty's embrace
Get off my face
Or Chino will chase

How do I sleep
When you'll just keep
Yourself on my face
Stupid Kitty's arms race

You ain't North Korea
or a corn tortilla
So please wash away
And don't disobey!

Or maybe you'll stay
My face on display
And it could be cool
Cause we'll have gang rule

By Laura D

"I washed my face twice and this Hello Kitty face tattoo won't come off"


Update

  • I created a new blog just for my photos...head over and have a peek! HERE
  • Chino the hamster now has an outdoor house of his own, a car too. Just for those times when Laura D is bothering him too much, he packs a little tiny suitcase and heads out there...
  •  I got a Hello Kitty face tattoo so I can be a tough guy like my idol Mike Tyson

FYI Mike Tyson is not my idol. ...No offense.

Monday, March 18, 2013

Another Poem in Scottish

Wuts eh point
in writing a poem
naebdy's gonnae care
cos it's a poem
it's naw eh telly.

By Laura D

Sunday, March 10, 2013

A Better Bio Than Mine

Damnit! This should've been my bio, it matches me perfectly!

"Laura may be young but she’s an old-fashioned romantic at heart and is just looking for love. She adores being the centre of attention, although you will have to excuse her penchant for dribbling, which often happens when she’s happy. Laura has the Feline Immunodeficiency Virus so needs a very special home where she can live indoors, but have some kind of outdoor access. Could you be Laura’s love?"

This is actually the bio of this lovely girl HERE

But still...I should just use that. My husband can attest to the dribbling part.

Saturday, March 09, 2013

Laura D's Bio

          Laura was born and raised in Scotland. The movie Braveheart was set in Scotland. Co-incidence? I think not. That movie made $210,409,945. This was merely the first of her successes.

          She went on to make many movies and tv shows for her own entertainment until 2005, when she landed her first paying tv gig. You know that Sherlock Holmes show on BBC you like so much? Yeah, it wasn't that, it was another Sherlock Holmes show on BBC...and she was cut out for time constraints (true story, check her IMDB here).

          She would later work for ITV, where she ate all the grapes from the lunch van. She still enjoys the occasional grape to this day.

          In 2012, Laura became a U.S. resident, much to America's dismay. During this time she worked as Campaign Manager for the "Chino 2012" campaign. Today, Laura refuses to stop uploading videos to Youtube despite never going viral...except when she has the flu...then she's totally viral.

Friday, March 08, 2013

Film Festivals

How come it costs to submit a movie to most film festivals?? Is it to keep out the riff raff like me?! Is it?! ...I bet it is...

Wednesday, March 06, 2013

Taylor Swift and Hell

Dear Mr and or Mrs Swift,

Your recent comments regarding women not helping other women and those women having a "special place in hell" is confusing my brain. You are not helping female comedians by limiting the kind of jokes we can make. I need say no more.

Sincerely,
Mr and or Mrs Laura D

Random Comments by Laura D

  • So on Sunday I spent the entire day in hospital, I overheard this one guy getting taken in. All the nurses are panicking. Heart rate? 250bpm!! Cause? Meth. Don't do meth kids...anyway, I prefer this heartbeat http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kDetwzG7igQ (go to 0.41)
  • I moved all the pictures and videos from my phone to my computer. Ahhh, my phone feels so much lighter, that's a nice feelin.
  • YESTERDAY! I had been saving some doors on my Hello Kitty calendar  so I could have a hit of chocolate right when I need it. So I goes to open it up I does. And what do I find? A Hello Kitty fridge magnet. A forking Hello Kitty fridge magnet. I cannot EAT a Hello Kitty fridge magnet.
  • I leave you now with this photo of little Chino....one of the few photos without the phenomena that I like to call "fur blur"